DISCLAMER: THIS BLOG SPEAKS THE TRUTH OF PARENTS WHO ARE PREGNANT WITH MULTIPLES. I AM IN NO WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM, ANGRY WITH PEOPLE FOR COMMENTS THAT THEY HAVE SAID TO US ABOUT OUR PREGNANCY. I UNDERSTAND IT COMES AS A SHOCK TO EVERYONE AND YOU MAY OR MAY NOT KNOW WHAT TO SAY. THIS BLOG IS INTENDED TO HOPEFULLY EDUCATE PEOPLE ON THE THINGS NOT TO SAY TO SOMEONE, OR WHAT THE COUPLE REALLY NEEDS TO HEAR INSTEAD OF THE NEGATIVE.
The other day while out with our family I had a person who had not seen me in a long time come up to congratulate me on being pregnant. I hadn't seen this person in a LONG time so he was oblivious to the fact that it was triplets. He asked do you know if it is a boy or girl. I said "Yes, Two Boys and a girl"...
Ok here is where the Questions come in, where the comments that sometimes make my heart smile or make my stomach hurt. I decided to write this Blog because I wanted to answer questions that people ask or think about a woman carrying multiples may or may not want to hear.
For starters, EVERYONE who finds out that you are pregnant with triplets has a different reaction. 9 out of 10 are the same and that being something that gets REALLY OLD!! " WOW, you are going to have your hands full" Pardon the honesty but in my head I am thinking "No KIDDING, you think!?!?!" Or " I sure hope you have help" Again I smile like I haven't heard that a MILLION times and say "Yeah I hope so too!!"
Ok, another thing is when talking to a pregnant woman the proper response is a simple "CONGRATULATIONS" or "I am so happy for you!!" I know being pregnant with Multiples is NOT COMMON, and can be shocking but, I can guarantee if you were us, when someone rolls their eyes or says "OH MAN, I'm SORRY" and pats your spouse on the shoulder you would get a little annoyed or heartbroken at the least.
Next, Although I appreciate opinions and advise from people and always have, PLEASE DONT tell a woman who is pregnant with multiples how hard life is going to be, or go into your horror stories of people who have had allot of kids or multiples themselves!! I can't handle hearing the NICU stories, the stories of loss or struggles someone went through with their multiples. HONESTLY PEOPLE, telling a pregnant woman those stories only induce IMMEDIATE PANNIC!!
Each day the Babies stay in my tummy is another day I celebrate. I am just taking it one day at a time, One hard, mentally or physically, emotionally challenging day at a time.
Here are the things I already know and can't believe people say to us..
" Life is going to be SOOOO HARD for SOOOO LONG" I know how hard life is going to be, I am up at night moving numbers, praying to God on my hands and knees so much that I now have burses.
I know how "Financially hard" it is going to be on my family. I have anxiety about that DAILY!!! No amount of moving numbers is going to fix that problem but, we will do the BEST we can to raise these Babies the BEST we can.
"Allison has no idea what she has in store for her" Thank you again for reminding me or for adding to the MOUNTAIN of GUILT a Mother already feels.
What people DON'T know is, I hold my little girl at night and cry sometimes because I don't ever want her to feel left out or not the AMAZING BLESSING that I PRAYED FOR my ENTIRE LIFE!! I know life is going to be "different for her" that "she won't know what hit her when the babies come home" I want to say to these people, "Thank you for your opinions but I have and do think about that a million times a day and I will do my best for the rest of my life to NEVER have her feel that she isn't as special to us as she is."
"Man you are going to get BIG" Thank you, I thought about that too but I am 26 weeks now and only gained 22 lbs so "BIG" may or may not be in my future. Does it my stomach hurt?? YES you try carrying 3 babies in your stomach stretching it DAILY and ask yourself it hurts. PLUS, NO WOMAN EVER WANTS TO BE TOLD SHE IS BIG!! I don't care if she is or not, it’s just not right.
Yes I am blessed with the wonderful comments from people who say "You are SOOO small still" "I seriously wouldn't think you were carrying triplets" or "From Behind you don't even look pregnant" And to those of you who have said that THANK YOU!! You don't know how much it means to me to hear that!!
Yes I am worried about the aftermath and how hard it will be to get back to where I worked my A$$ off to be before this pregnancy but, The key word is I did it before and I can do it again. After Allison, I lost all the Baby weight in less than a month and managed to be smaller than I was before I had her... And in HS!!! So to you Nay Sayers, Weight Watchers worked the first time and it will again and Gaiam Pilates will have me back in shape in no time. So Thank you for your support on that matter too. :)
Ok the last thing and I will let you go is. "Did you do something to have these triplets" or "Did you plan for the triplets" "Does this run in your families" This comment I actually am not upset with. I know 100% that times are different and Medicine has changed and multiples are normally because of some sort of help.
Well.. That answer is complicated and not easy to get into with strangers. But for your Blog Readers who don't know us well or our story... Last summer we had some complications, and a very HARD SUMMER that lasted FOREVER!! After a surgery and MANY TRIPS to the Hospital because of complications from the surgery and situation we faced last August, Mother Nature just wouldn't start again. The Doctors gave me a Medicine to just get things going.... Welcome our Triplets!!
I didn't undergo a procedure that costs thousands of dollars, I did not plan for triplets, I did not ask for us to be in the situation we are facing in a month or so BUT, What I WILL say is WE ARE SOOOO BLESSED with these Babies!! That Sometimes prayer get answered in ways you couldn't imagine. I did have people praying for us all over the world and maybe, just Maybe the prayers flooded Gods office all at once and he answered accordingly.
Yes we are less than 1% to have this situation happen to us from taking that medicine and you know what, that was in God’s plan for us!! What happened last summer was AWEFUL!! It was DEVISTATING but God had a bigger plan for us and EVERY TIME I see their BEAUTIFUL hearts going and see their BREATH TAKING faces on the monitor I am in AWE of how much TRUST the Lord has in My Husband and I!!!Out of the BILLIONS of women who are praying to get pregnant a day.. He chose ME to carry THREE of his little MIRICLES!! US to raise these little peanuts into people who are going to change the world... I know this because they have already changed mine in ways they will never imagine.
So the answers to some of your questions hopefully have been answered, and maybe just maybe one of you readers will read this and run into an old friend who is having twins or like us more and you will remember this Blog and be the people who are HAPPY for them and say "CONGRATULATIONS!!!, I AM SOOO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!" Because those of you who have said that THANK YOU!!!! That is JUST WHAT WE NEED TO HEAR!!! :D People HAPPY FOR US, SUPPORTING US, AND TO REMIND US WHEN THINGS GET HARD THAT GOD BLESSED US BOUNTFULLY AND Philippians 4:13 - All things are possible through Christ who strengthens me!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment